The government has to today sought to end speculation around the identity of the former minister and current MP who has been arrested on suspicion of rape by asking people to focus instead on the 363 Tory MPs who haven’t.
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The government has hailed the news that life expectancies have stopped their unpatriotic climb and are finally heading towards the levels last seen in the halcyon days before 1973, while explaining that work is ongoing to replicate this across all facets of life.
Boris Johnson is to give his three-month-old son a peerage, it has emerged.
The Prime Minister of the United Kingdom is being as decisive as usual.
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