The hit show Crimewatch, which ran for thirty-three series because Brits enjoy committing crimes so much, is to make a return to TV next year, but following new government guidance, the programme will be renamed to make it more patriotic.
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A delighted Brexit supporter is today demanding his milk in units not understood by anyone under the age of 50.
Prince Philip’s mistresses, illegitimate children, and donations to dubious causes are to remain a secret for 90 years it is revealed today.
The UK is set to free itself of the cursed EU nonsense of units of ten and instead return to good, proper, sensible ones like inches, pounds, bushels, pecks, tods, perches, and kilderkin.
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