UK

We thought you knew cronyism was part of the deal, Conservatives tell public

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The Conservatives are apparently baffled by allegations of corruption, given they assumed the electorate was fully aware of what they were like.

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Boots ‘mix and match’ vaccine gift sets to be ready for Christmas

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Boots will be offering ‘mix and match’ vaccine gift sets just in time for Christmas it is revealed today.

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Prince Andrew furious after being told he can’t take a date to his Dad’s funeral

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Prince Andrew is on the warpath today after Palace insiders revealed that he is not being allowed to bring a date to his father’s funeral on Saturday.

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Man seriously considers thinking about washing his face mask

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After a year of regular use, a man’s face mask might soon be due for a wash.

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William and Harry unite to pay tribute to Prince Philip, before bare-knuckle ‘straightener’ in palace gardens

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Princes William and Harry have united today to pay tribute to their late grandfather the Duke of Edinburgh, before proceeding to a bare-knuckle ‘settler’ in the gardens of the palace to sort out their differences.

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David Cameron seen flogging access to ministers out of a suitcase down the market

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Ex-Prime Minister David Cameron has come under fire again after he was seen down the market, flogging access to ministers out of a suitcase.

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Nation full of men with new haircuts and blinding hangovers

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The nation is full of men with fresh hangovers and even fresher haircuts, according to reports.

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Man excited, motivated and finally ready to return to the gym, but not on a Monday though, obviously

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A man is extremely excited, highly motivated and finally ready to return to the gym it is revealed today, not on a Monday though obviously.

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Chaos on nation’s roads after traffic lights are painted black to mark Prince Philip’s passing

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There has been chaos on roads across the country today after thousands of traffic lights were turned black as a ‘mark of respect’ towards the passing of Prince Philip.

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White Witch curses Britain to ‘always winter and never the end of lockdown’

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As snow falls over Britain today, the White Witch has claimed responsibility for covering the land in endless winter.

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