Conservative party gives Boris Johnson yet another last chance
‘If you fuck up again there will be consequences and we really really mean it this time,’ senior Conservatives have told Boris Johnson today.
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Nigel Farage furious as nation exerts its sovereign powers to decide who can cross its borders
Nigel Farage has this morning been left distraught after the sovereign nation of Australia used its sovereign powers to decide who can and can’t cross its borders.
Scientists discover positive correlation between proximity to Boris Johnson and daily alcohol consumption
The closer you are to Boris Johnson, the more alcohol you are likely to consume, according to science this morning.
Queen torn between accepting government’s apology and just having the lot of them beheaded
After the government announced it has apologised to the Palace for two parties held at Downing Street during lockdown, the Queen is said to be undecided on her response.
