Boris Johnson’s next speech is set to be written in really big coloured Crayola Crayons it has been revealed today in order for him to be able to follow it and understand what he’s saying.
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Prime Minister and twice winner of Horrible Fat Bastard magazine’s Man of the Year Boris Johnson has announced that Peppa Pig’s Dad will be joining his cabinet with immediate effect.
A man watching the nightly violence on the streets of major European cities has today lauded the rioters as ‘brave freedom fighters’, despite insisting the mostly peaceful BLM of last summer were orchestrated by ‘violent thugs’.
Currently out of work manager Steve Bruce is definitely the right man to keep Manchester United in the premier league, according to season ticket holders today.
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