A man with a shit memory, who hasn’t remembered his plastic carrier bags at the shops for weeks is confident today that the massive 5p increase in cost will finally cure his memory.
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Observers from the Guinness Book of Records have arrived in Jersey amid reports that France has got to midday without running up Le Tricolor Blanc.
Here’s a confession: I am a really, REALLY lazy writer. I very rarely do more than two drafts of a story before hitting “submit” and just praying it’s good enough that a few of you fine folks will find it funny. In the Trump days, it was even easier; you’d just write exactly what he said, pepper in a few instances of the word “YUGE” and then go for lunch.
Snow White has been found dead in a castle today after refusing to sign a consent form allowing Prince Charming to bring her back to life with a kiss.
Keep up with the latest bouts of catastrophic
bellendry from all around the world.
