Society

‘We shouldn’t have to work today, it’s a disgrace’ says man sat in garden occasionally moving his laptop mouse

A man has declared that we should not have to work today and it should be declared a bank holiday, whilst sat in his garden in the sunshine occasionally moving the mouse on his laptop.

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Daily Express wanks itself dry as Princess Diana’s grandson celebrates birthday on Saint George’s Day

The Daily Express has spuffed all over the place.

Seagulls still absolute pricks

Seagulls are still absolute pricks, even after a year of lockdown in which to think about their behaviour, it has been revealed today.

US Police committed to ending all killing of unarmed black men, on camera

Police in the US have today vowed to end all killing of unarmed black men by their officers, on camera.

Tight-arse getting chest pains ahead of this weekend after realising it might finally be his round

Beach full of turds in burger boxes to feature heavily in new ‘Visit Britain’ campaign

“All Lives Matter!” insists woman who crosses the street when she sees a homeless person

Straightforward work question turns into epic email trail involving seventeen people AGAIN

You’re long overdue for a painful scratching, decides cat purring on your lap

Airplane banners the latest weapon in lifting the taboo on micropenises

Number of plans made in lockdown for ‘when all this is over’ falls for third day running

Father obviously unloved due to lack of public Facebook message wishing him Happy Father’s Day

Druids facing summer solstice shock as protesters demolish ‘monument to oppression’ at Stonehenge

Katie Hopkins supporters mistaking ‘freedom of speech infringement’ with ‘everyone thinking she’s a dick’

Study confirms 95% of Britons easily tricked by fake statistics

Box manufacturer goes bust after thinking outside the box

Government performs U-turn on willingness to perform U-turns

Outrage as satire site dares to mock racists more than anti-racists

Nickelodeon confirms Spongebob is a chemsex-loving leather bear

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