Deliveroo driver definitely thinks you’re a lazy, greedy bastard
Your constant, obscenely large takeaway orders mean that your Deliveroo driver has you pegged as an overindulgent loser.
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Queen’s Star Wars themed funeral plans leaked
Royal sources are said to be deeply disturbed that the Queen’s plans for a Star Wars-themed funeral have been leaked to the press.
Man proclaiming to be a ‘classical liberal’ actually just a bit racist
In a stunning turn of events, a man claiming to be a follower of “Western Liberalism” is not an impish provocateur desiring to keep people and markets free of state interference, but rather a somewhat ignorant man with a bizarre hostility towards dark-skinned people.
Man shrinks his feet as shop assistant helpfully offers size eight as they have no elevens in stock
A man has shrunk his feet today after a helpful shop assistant at his local shoe store helpfully offered a size eight shoe due to unfortunately having no size elevens left in stock.
