The five-second rule regarding the safe consumption of food that has fallen on the floor has been reduced to two seconds in light of the new variant tearing across the country.
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Many large companies are cancelling their office Christmas parties this year, and instead are asking employees to quietly have their own individual Christmas parties alone at their own desks.
‘Tis the season to constantly clear up stray bits of tinsel, so your vacuum cleaner needs to be in great shape.
Most customers already just stagger straight from bed to the doughnut and Quavers aisle without getting dressed, and the new rule is to ensure the few other people who might have wandered in by mistake don’t make them feel uncomfortable.
Keep up with the latest bouts of catastrophic
bellendry from all around the world.
