A man has returned to his table at breakfast on the first day of his all-inclusive holiday with a nice bowl of cereal, some pasta topped with fish, scrambled, fried and boiled egg, yoghurt, watermelon and a plate full of bacon.
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A man who spent weeks on end scouring the Internet to save forty-two pounds on his family holiday, has happily spent over £200 on unnecessary shite at the airport.
In an exclusive collaboration with Her Majesty’s Cabinet Office, NewsThump is able to reveal some of the treasured symbols of times-gone-by that were cruelly banned by the EU, but will now be making a glorious return.
A man has this morning decided to publicly out himself as a low-information simpleton by pointing at the sky and loudly shouting ‘chemtrails’.
Keep up with the latest bouts of catastrophic
bellendry from all around the world.
