By 2040 the UK will have excellent rail links to Wigan, a benefit that young people are happy more than offsets having to live with their parents forever on an uninhabitable planet.
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In a now-deleted Tweet, the Culture Secretary and famous connoisseur of exotic delicacies said that online bullying had reached epidemic proportions and that any journalist mocking her attempts to curb it would be “shot then skullfucked with a rusty trowel.”
The government has defended its decision to scrap the East Midlands to Leeds HS2 rail link today after admitting that they actually thought Leeds was in Manchester when the initial plans were agreed.
As Amazon announced it would stop allowing customers to pay using Visa Credit cards due to a rise in fees charged by the payment company, Brexiters everywhere have celebrated the opportunity to give more money to banks.
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