A tumultuous morning of departures and Cabinet reshuffles saw die-hard Johnson loyalist Nadine Dorries rewarded with the high profile position of Number 10 resident feline after the previous incumbent Larry resigned, citing “moral impossibility of living with that fat shit.”
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“Prime” Minister Boris Johnson is set to announce the formation of a league of superheroes to battle crime as part of this week’s desperate bid to save position.
Boris Johnson has described his new cabinet as representing the ‘gold standard’ of talent in the current Parliamentary Conservative Party this morning.
The entire nation let out a sigh of relief this morning after it realised it was actually saved from the chaos of an Ed Miliband government.
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