Prominent Leave personalities have taken to social media to hail the return of Nigel Farage to active political life, and insist that his activity would shake up the Westminster establishment despite his legendary inability to get people to vote for him personally.
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The burkha represses women but also increases the likelihood of them posing a risk to security, somehow, according to reports this morning.
Labour Leader Jeremy Corbyn has today denied links to well-known scoundrel and bad egg Dick Dastardly, after photographs emerged of the two sharing a car.
The government has this morning expressed its gratitude to the car crash outside Westminster for distracting the nation from the car crash currently unfolding inside the building.
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