Lord Voldemort, once known as little Tom Riddle from the orphanage who liked to torture kids, has made a public statement claiming to love all Muggles, despite a long history of hate crimes against them.
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As Boris Johnson refuses to negotiate with the EU and the prospect of No Deal becomes very real, leave supporters are relishing the prospect of blaming any economic downturn on the Mayor of London.
Modern-day gladiator and brave war veteran Mark Francois has today demanded he be allowed a seat at the table for Prime Minister Boris Johnson’s no-deal ‘war cabinet’ meetings.
A man who used an enchanted monkey’s paw to make three wishes is now suffering the consequences of tampering with fate.
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