Boris Johnson’s government has announced that it has learned the lessons of the past and will carefully avoid mentioning Windrush when deporting British people who, how can they put it, “may not be fond of winter sports”.
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The UK, a country that is most certainly not populated by hordes of barely sentient curtain-twitchers, has shown the world its brilliance by deciding that, of all the complex problems it faces, an MP showing her shoulder in Westminster was the one worth debating.
A fox that wandered into the House of Parliament yesterday evening ended up being savagely ripped to shreds by a pack of Tory MPs, it has emerged.
Prince Andrew’s 60th birthday will be marked by councils across the country by flying Pizza Express menus outside their offices.
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