Furious Britons still unable to purchase bendy bananas
British shoppers have woken up today to find bendy bananas are still off the menu, according to reports.
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Brexit riots cancelled as it’s a bit nippy outside
Brexiters would be taking to the streets with pitchforks today if it wasn’t quite so chilly.
“Still here then?” chuckles EU
Britain didn’t leave the EU today, much to the amusement of the EU.
Terrifying, demon-faced trick-or-treater actually just Mark Francois canvassing for votes
Police have received several calls from concerned members of the public complaining of a horrifying, shouty, red-faced demon at their door.
