Brexit

Chris Grayling goes into hiding after hearing government will keep ‘low-skilled workers’ out of the country

Former Transport Secretary Chris Grayling has gone into hiding after the government announced plans to deny work visas for non-skilled workers after Brexit.

View article >

Brexiter who has never set foot in a museum insists nation fights to the death to keep Elgin marbles

Brexit voter Simon Williams is happy to see the nation go to war to keep hold of the Elgin marbles, in order to show Johnny Foreigner that Brexit Britain can’t be pushed around.

Italy threatens to veto UK’s free-trade agreement with EU unless nation stops serving chips with lasagna

Inspired by Greece’s demand for a return of the Elgin Marbles if the UK wants a free trade agreement with the EU, Italy has insisted that British people stop debasing Italian food, and while we’re at it they can leave off the stupid ‘Mamma Mia’ impressions.

EU can shove its generous flood defence fund insist Brexiters up to their necks in water

Partially submerged Brexit voters have told the EU to stick their flood defence funds ‘where the sun don’t shine’ – or ‘England’ as it is more commonly known.