Social gatherings with more than six people to be banned for everyone except Dominic Cummings
A new spike in COVID cases has seen the government introduce restrictions on social gatherings for everyone who isn’t Dominic Cummings.
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New rise in Covid figures ‘a middle-class hoax to have free theatre streams reinstated’
It has been revealed that the spike in Covid figures is actually a hoax perpetrated by the middle classes in order to have free streams of National Theatre productions reinstated.
Heroic anti-masker demonstrates formidable bravery not seen since the Blitz by going maskless in Tesco
Modern-day Churchill and brave freedom fighter Simon Williams has today channelled the Blitz spirit of his forefathers to complete his weekly supermarket shop without wearing a mask.
‘Don’t kill your gran’ says man whose decisions killed 20,000 grans
Health Secretary Matt Hancock has this week urged the nations young people not to ‘kill your gran’ by becoming infected by coronavirus, having already allowed thousands of untested hospital patients into care homes himself causing the preventable deaths of up to 20,000 grans.
