Health

No-one has the right to tell me what to do with my body, insists anti-vaxxer who says women shouldn’t have right to choose

Thumbnail image for No-one has the right to tell me what to do with my body, insists anti-vaxxer who says women shouldn’t have right to choose

A religious anti-vaxxer who is today loudly insisting that no one has the right to tell him what to do with his body, also firmly believes that women should not have the right to choose what they do with their bodies.

Read the full article →

Ozzy Osbourne to release ‘No More Tiers’ to celebrate the end of lockdown

Thumbnail image for Ozzy Osbourne to release ‘No More Tiers’ to celebrate the end of lockdown

As various lockdown and tier restrictions are lifted across the UK, Ozzy Osbourne is to release ‘No more tiers’ in recognition of the event.

Read the full article →

Coronavirus reluctantly set to leave Britain as agreed

Thumbnail image for Coronavirus reluctantly set to leave Britain as agreed

The Coronavirus has packed up and is leaving Britain, as agreed, later today. Thus allowing Boris’s Freedom Day to take place and all Covid restrictions to be lifted.

Read the full article →

“NOW how will I cheat on my current wife?”

Thumbnail image for “NOW how will I cheat on my current wife?”

Boris Johnson will be self-isolating despite the fact he has fucking about to do.

Read the full article →

Johnson and Sunak begin new ‘do what the f*ck you like’ pilot after being told to isolate

Thumbnail image for Johnson and Sunak begin new ‘do what the f*ck you like’ pilot after being told to isolate

Boris Johnson and Rishi Sunsk have begun a brand new ‘do what the fuck you like’ pilot today after being told to self-isolate by NHS test and trace.

Read the full article →

Coronavirus self-isolating after contracting dangerous Sajid Javid variant

Thumbnail image for Coronavirus self-isolating after contracting dangerous Sajid Javid variant

Coronavirus is today beginning a period of self-isolating after being diagnosed with the dangerous Sajid Javid variant.

Read the full article →

UK braced for glorious weather, just as everyone in the entire country is told to isolate

Thumbnail image for UK braced for glorious weather, just as everyone in the entire country is told to isolate

UK temperatures are set to soar this weekend with several days of glorious weather ahead, just as everyone in the country has been told to isolate following a ping on their NHS app or having had children sent home from school.

Read the full article →

Government confirm ‘No more Lockdowns’ as Test & Trace app tells entire country to self-isolate

Thumbnail image for Government confirm ‘No more Lockdowns’ as Test & Trace app tells entire country to self-isolate

UK Government plc has confirmed that there will be no more Covid lockdowns, just as their magnificent Test & Trace app pings literally everyone in the country to lock themselves in their house and not see anyone.

Read the full article →

Starbucks Caramel Frappe to cost £3,000 as new sugar tax unveiled

Thumbnail image for Starbucks Caramel Frappe to cost £3,000 as new sugar tax unveiled

A Venti Caramel Frappe from Starbucks could cost up to £3,000 it has been revealed today, as details of a new potential ‘sugar tax’ is unveiled for sales of food and drinks in the UK.

Read the full article →

Heroic anti-masker demonstrates formidable bravery not seen since the Blitz by refusing to wear a mask in Tesco

Thumbnail image for Heroic anti-masker demonstrates formidable bravery not seen since the Blitz by refusing to wear a mask in Tesco

Modern-day Churchill and brave freedom fighter Simon Williams has today channelled the Blitz spirit of his forefathers to complete his weekly supermarket shop without wearing a mask.

Read the full article →