A keen Brexiter who spent five years insisting the nation’s rules should only be set by our sovereign parliament is suddenly not that keen on complying with the rules set by his newly-sovereign parliament if it means wearing a bit of cloth over his face to do the shopping.
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Most customers already just stagger straight from bed to the doughnut and Quavers aisle without getting dressed, and the new rule is to ensure the few other people who might have wandered in by mistake don’t make them feel uncomfortable.
There are plans for the World Health Organisation to abandon the flawed Greek alphabet system of naming Covid variants in favour of the works of Adam Sandler, it has emerged.
A new Star Wars prequel has been announced that will detail the early period of Empire rule in which the Sith attempted to make everyone in the galaxy wear a small cloth mask over their mouth when they pop to the shops.
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