New species of half bike/half prick emerges
Scientists have hailed the next stage in evolution as a new species of half bike/half prick emerges from the roads of the home-counties.
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Diane Abbott reveals she has type 4,783,128 diabetes
Labour MP Diane Abbott has revealed that she has type 4,783,128 diabetes and that the condition had forced her to take a break from the General Election campaign.
Government introduces “If you’re well enough to wank, you’re well enough to work” policy
The Department of Work and Pensions has today introduced a policy it calls “If you’re well enough to wank, you’re well enough to work”.
Every bathroom in Britain to receive complimentary UKIP manifesto
The UKIP election slogan is “Soft, strong and very very long”, according to the manifesto launched today.
