Boris Johnson has a valuable tip for the British people: “Beat the spread of Coronavirus by showing up in public as rarely as I do”, he told reporters today.
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Many people had tried to kill Max von Sydow, by means variously including crashing a spaceship into him, using the Dark Side of the Force, and doing battle with the devil himself – so making it to 90 was a remarkable achievement for a truly wonderful actor.
After sponsors of Crufts asked their staff not to attend the dog show citing Coronavirus fears, the event’s organisers have announced additional precautions against the spread of infection, including asking all competing dogs to spend at least 20 seconds when they lick their own rear ends.
Local metaller Simon Williams has asked doctors to say he is ‘down with the sickness’ after being diagnosed with Coronavirus.
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