EnvironmentSocietyUKWarning that heatwave could lead to months worth of tedious conversations in just 24 hours
EnvironmentUKMet Office issues heatwave warning urging climate change deniers to maybe shut the fuck up for a while
SocietyTechnologyUKJames Webb telescope provides tantalising glimpse 5 billion years into the past with the first pictures of Jacob Rees-Mogg’s childhood
ScienceTechnologyOh you like the James Webb Space Telescope? Fine, name three of its spectrographic analyses of exoplanet atmospheres
PoliticsUK‘Judge my actions not my wealth’ says man whose actions include breaking the law and supporting Boris while secretly plotting to replace him
EntertainmentWorldLars Ulrich claws his way into the Upside Down to charge Eddie Munson 17 cents in royalties
PoliticsUKSajid Javid to be humanely destroyed after falling badly at first fence in Tory leadership race
EntertainmentPoliticsUKNation riveted by Prime Ministerial election in which they are not allowed to vote
PoliticsSportsUKPriti Patel rules herself out of Tory leadership race to focus deporting Sir Mo Farah
PoliticsUKPriti Patel still undecided whether to use Union flags or just swastikas in her leadership bid video
HealthSocietyUK“Vegans never shut up about it!” insists man who has instagrammed every steak he’s ever eaten
PoliticsUKKeyser Soze, Biff Tannen, Megatron, Satan, and Gripper Stebson all confirm Tory leadership bids
BusinessSportsWorld‘I’ve no idea where this Ferrari stuffed with cash on my driveway came from’ insists judge clearing Platini and Blatter of fraud
PoliticsUKBoris Johnson pretty confident everyone will have forgotten about this whole ‘resigning’ thing by September
