BrexitPoliticsUKDonald Trump suggests UK builds great wall across Northern Ireland and gets EU to pay for it
BusinessPoliticsWorldMan who didn’t understand the Customs Union moves neatly on to not understanding the WTO
EntertainmentSocietyQueen calls for ‘respect and understanding’ between normal people and the mindless twats who disagree with them
PoliticsWorldI have decided to delay Congress speech, says President not invited to make Congress speech
BrexitPoliticsUKI’ll be wearing blue face paint and riding a horse to Brexit talks with PM, confirms Nicola Sturgeon
BrexitBusinessUKBrexit will be so good for the UK’s global trading relationships that I’m moving my company HQ to Singapore, by James Dyson
BrexitPoliticsUKCharlie Brooker appointed Brexit Secretary to provide everyone with personalised alternate ending
EntertainmentSocietyUKWoman inspired by Marie Kondo to tidy entire home just focusing efforts on husband’s crap for now
UKSecond referendum would threaten social cohesion, says woman whose immigration scare-mongering has helped destroy social cohesion
BrexitPoliticsBrexiters demand future negotiations be carried out in railway car near Compiegne, France
SocietyUKPrince Philip opts to attend driver safety awareness course instead of having points added to his licence
BusinessPoliticsUKJacob Rees-Mogg asks his LBC listeners which race of boy makes the best chimney sweep
PoliticsScienceUKContinued existence of Chris Grayling leads to concern that human evolution is broken
BrexitPoliticsUKWe are having a second vote on my deal in case anyone has changed their mind, insists irony-free Theresa May