BusinessHealthPoliticsUKEmployees encouraged to cram back into offices so Starbucks can carry on avoiding tax
BusinessHealthPoliticsUKGovernment responsible for worst COVID-19 death toll in Europe perplexed that people not keen to go back to offices
PoliticsWorld“Biden would see violence on the streets the likes of which we haven’t seen in nearly three days” declares Trump
HealthSocietyTechnologyUKConspiracy theorist who refuses to wear a mask still confident tinfoil hats are effective
BusinessUKWorldWhen I get to $300bn I will let my warehouse employees have hassle-free toilet breaks, insists Jeff Bezos
PoliticsUKWorldFormer Aussie PM Tony Abbott fails to pass UK’s new Aussie-style points-based immigration system
HealthPoliticsUKAs Storm Francis shows signs of weakening, Storm Boris enters 14th month of wreaking havoc across the country
EntertainmentPoliticsSocietyUKRacist man with sordid past somehow unbothered by Britain’s racist, sordid past
SportsUK‘If Man Utd couldn’t make him part of a credible defence, what chance did we have?’ ask Harry Maguire’s lawyers
PoliticsWorldDoctors who claim Russian opposition leader was ‘probably poisoned’ also insist that Pope is ‘probably Catholic’
PoliticsScienceWorldSorry, my aim was a little off, says God after NASA confirms asteroid won’t hit Earth
EducationScienceSocietyUKMan who bunked off every science lesson at school insists he’s done ‘all his own research’ on vaccines
PoliticsWorldIf Biden wins, good Christians will be forced to watch the pool boy f*ck their wives, warns Republicans
EntertainmentPoliticsSocietyUK‘Land Of Hope And Glory’ to be dropped from Last Night Of The Proms after being fact-checked
PoliticsWorldMelania Trump channels husband in overhaul of White House rose garden by removing all flowers of colour
PoliticsWorld“I’d been planning to build the wall out of yachts, drugs and prostitutes,” insists Steve Bannon
EducationPoliticsUKHead teachers appeal high GCSE grades to better prepare students for getting fucked over by older people
PoliticsWorldDonald Trump wondering if he will have to take time away from his busy golfing schedule to pardon yet another former advisor
