Free speech enthusiast now up to three boycotts a week

author avatar by 4 weeks ago

A man who is a staunch believer in free speech after spending the last four years bemoaning cancel culture, is now up to three boycotts a week because of people saying things he didn’t like.

Simon Williams believes free speech is essential to a functioning democracy, and has spent years criticising anyone who attempts to stifle the opinions of others, no matter how abhorrent they may be, insisting that the ‘marketplace of ideas’ is where those opinions should live or die.

However, he has recently developed a taste for cancel culture, and is now up to three boycotted brands a week.

Williams told us, “Calling for a boycott of a store because they put a rainbow flag in the window is so exhilarating! Who knew that trying to cancel things was so much fun! Sure, I decried this behaviour for years, but now I realise how thrilling it is, and I much prefer it to trying to argue against an opinion I don’t like.

“I’m going to pretend that me loudly calling for boycotts is VERY different to the cancel culture that I called a ‘cancer’, because admitting anything else would make me a massive hypocrite.

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“In the last week, I’ve boycotted Sainsbury’s, Waitrose and now Wickes. Sure, I wasn’t planning to spend any money in any of them, but I’m happy to share online that I’m depriving them of my money. Any brand that even tries to be inclusive deserves to go out of business.

“There are beers I won’t drink, shops I won’t go into, restaurants I won’t eat at, films I won’t watch, holiday destinations I won’t visit, clothes I won’t wear. I have to keep a journal so I can stay on top of all the places I’m now boycotting.

“This is what it REALLY means to be a free speech enthusiast these days.”

Meanwhile, reports are emerging that thanks to a trending hashtag on Twitter, DIY store Waitrose is now almost entirely arsehole-free.

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