Man confident he can pivot from not watching Dan Wootton on television to not watching him online

author avatar by 1 month ago

Former GB News presenter and tabloid gossip columnist Dan Wootton has announced he is taking his own show ‘online’, leaving millions of viewers wondering if they will be able to ignore him on the Internet in the same way they’ve ignored him on the television.

After being fired by the ailing GB News, Wootton explained that he would be setting up his own independent online platform. His new online show will specialise in going through the bins of celebrities and other pieces designed to confirm the biases of his audience.

However, television owner Simon Williams is confident he will be able to avoid watching Wootton’s new output.

He told us, “I’ve spent the last few years successfully avoiding Dan Wootton on television, like most of the country if GB News’ viewing figures are to be believed – and I’m quite confident the Wootton-avoiding skills I’ve developed over that time will also allow me to avoid seeing him online.

“It might sound like a challenge, but honestly, pivoting to closing a tab or pressing the back button in your browser and away from changing the channel on the TV isn’t all that difficult, and I’m confident I will have no issues whatsoever avoiding Wootton’s output just because he’s gone onto the Internet.

“In fact, I’ve become so good at avoiding Dan Wootton that if he were to come into our house over dinner and deliver a twenty-minute monologue on why Meghan is the devil reincarnate, I’m not sure I’d even notice.”

Based on an original comment by NewsThump reader Owen Nooman.