Wetherspoons carpet cleaners deny being on strike for the last twenty years

author avatar by 2 months ago

Wetherspoons carpet cleaners have been forced to deny being on strike and doing literally nothing for the last twenty years. 

With further industrial action planned across the rail network this month, carpet cleaners at Wetherspoons have been forced to deny that they have also been on a really long strike for over two decaded, and involving all employees.

A spokesperson for Wetherspoons confirmed, “Yes, the people who clean the carpets are still working here, apparently.

“We can confirm that the carpet cleaners at Wetherspoons are not actually on strike, and should be cleaning the carpets. 

“Obviously to the untrained eye this may seem somewhat implausible, given the state of the carpets,  and the fact that you can hardly walk on them without sticking to the floor. 

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“But we have been assured by the cleaners themselves that they are definitely not on strike,  and genuinely clean the carpets.  Or so they say.

“It would be nice if we weren’t the only venue where our customers have to wipe their feet on the way out.”

Asked if the toilet cleaners are also claiming not to be on strike we were told, “No, they just can’t find the things as they are bloody miles away.”