The huge moth with which you did battle in your bedroom last night, is having its revenge from beyond the grave today by steadfastly refusing to flush away.
After a heroic twenty-minute struggle that saw you finally emerge breathless and victorious, you had assumed that the defeated moth had been consigned to history.
You went on, “He put up a brave fight, and you have to give him credit, he came for my face several times when I least expected it. It totally threw me if I’m honest. Yes, I had a fourteen stone weight advantage, but he was very quick, as you’d expect for a much lighter fighter – but in the end, he wasn’t quick enough to avoid me and the rolled-up copy of yesterday’s newspaper.
“So I wrapped him in tissue and put his dusty remains down the toilet, flushed, and went to bed to sleep the sleep of the victorious.
“But this morning he was still there, floating on top of the water – looking up, as if to taunt me.
“I’ve tried flushing him again, flushing him with loads of toilet roll, I’ve even urinated on his remains to try and get him a bit more waterlogged so he’ll finally disappear under the water – but he just stays there, popping back up to the surface as the water settles after each flush. It’s like he’s swallowed a balloon.
“I’m actually considering scooping him out of the toilet and throwing him in the garden for the birds to eat, but it feels like getting me to put my hand in the toilet would be his final victory.
“But I will not let him beat me. I simply refuse. I will just keep flushing until he disappears, because if I’ve learned anything, it’s that repeatedly doing the same thing and expecting a differing outcome is the behaviour of champions.”