Every suspect in Russian Cluedo is Vladimir Putin

author avatar by 1 month ago

Popular murder-mystery boardgame Cluedo is to release a new edition for the Russian market in which every suspect is Vladimir Putin.

The game, in which players must compare notes and clues to try and identify who killed the victim, using which weapon and where the crime took place, is getting a modern facelift for release in the Russian Federation to take into the reality of living there into account.

Traditionally set in a Tudor Mansion and featuring suspects like Miss Scarlet or Professor Plum wielding a rope, candlestick, gun or knife, changes include the victim being found in a crumpled heap beneath a high window whilst the only suspect smirks because he reckons nobody dares do anything about it.

“Games always evolve and adapt to a changing world,” said game line manager Simonov Williamsovitch.

“For example, we’re also planning a new version of Monopoly for Russia where every single square says ‘Go to Prison’ on it.

“And instead of getting 200 Rubles for passing go, you get them when a relative is killed by the Ukrainian army.”

F**K Putin – get the mug here!