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The nation’s deluded racists remain steadfastly convinced homelessness and poverty would end if we stopped helping asylum seekers.
As migrant numbers continue to be the go-to argument for the desperately ill-informed, many have taken to social media to repeatedly demonstrate their ignorance on the matter.
Simon Williams, who has never been known to volunteer, donate money or help anyone in need, was keen to let everyone know which newspapers he reads during a heated debate on social media.
“Veterans living on the street is a disgrace,” Williams explained, apparently unaware that absolutely no one at all disagrees with him on this point.
“All these migrants getting cushy numbers at the taxpayer’s expense while people sleep on the streets is disgusting,” he went on, apparently unaware that there is absolutely nothing stopping the government spending taxpayer money on helping the homeless.
“If we could stop the boats, then the government would spend that money on homeless people and hungry kids instead,” he went on, finally demonstrating his total ignorance and apparently amnesia around the fact that it took a high-profile England footballer publicly shaming the government to get them to feed children in a poverty – for just a few weeks.
“My personal belief that a government – which has repeatedly demonstrated its complete reluctance to help vulnerable people – will completely change the way it treats those vulnerable people the very moment it deals with the migrant issue in a way that panders to my own personal beliefs, is most definitely the hill I am willing to die on.”
When asked about his personal acts of philanthropy and charitable work, Williams was quick to defend himself.
“I do plenty to help others,” he said. “I always make sure to leave a nice tip at the restaurant, and I always say ‘please’ and ‘thank you’ to the staff. I’m lovely.”
Despite the overwhelming evidence to the contrary, Williams and millions of others remain convinced that they are compassionate and caring individuals who just know the government would make everything better if only we could stop the brown people in the boats.
The Cabinet of Arseholes – see the latest iteration of the all-time best-seller!
