The ultimate power over who does, and does not, sit in Parliament should reside in the hands of a popular vote, according to a man who just ducked a popular vote to see if the voters wanted him to stay sitting in Parliament.
Boris Johnson, 58 (children), was invited to stand for re-election in the constituency of Uxbridge and Ruislip after Parliament noticed they couldn’t entirely trust what he was saying from one moment to the next.
However, he took a principled decision to step aside after learning that recent polls showed he’d probably lose.
“It’s the voters, the demos, the vox populi in whom this sort of power should rest,” Johnson told reporters, wearily recording this same old line of bollocks outside his house.
“Which is why I’ve decided to leave Parliament instead of placing my future in the hands of those same voters, the demos and especially the vox of the populi who have decided they’re sick of me.”
“The sort of kangaroo court which demands politicians demonstrate the support of the electorate is clearly biased and unfair against a believer in the British constitution, like myself, who is convinced politicians should demonstrate the support of the electorate.
“Anyway, I hope to demonstrate the electorate still backs me, just as soon as I can get into a constituency with more than a twenty-thousand majority, as that’s how many votes I’ll probably lose.”