Crocodiles busy forming organised religion after tale of ‘virgin birth’

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Crocodiles around the world have begun forming an organised religion to worship a deity they believe is responsible for a virgin birth of a crocodile.

As news spread that a crocodile laid an egg with a viable embryo, despite no male involvement in the conception, thousands of crocodiles have insisted this must be due to ‘divine intervention’.

“There is no other possible explanation,” said crocodile Simon Williams, who travelled hundreds of miles with a totally inappropriate gift for an infant crocodile.

“Our new diety will bring divinity to our species. This will lead to crocodiles everywhere finally having some meaning to their lives, and an answer to the eternal question of what happens when we die. I, for one, am delighted.”

When asked about what happens next as religion develops in the crocodile community, Williams was more circumspect.

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He went on, “Sure, I expect it will go pretty swimmingly for about a thousand years, and then we’ll probably divide into factions with slightly diverging beliefs and fight a few bloody wars to decide whose version of this story is the best.

“Then a thousand years after that, entire political movements will use this event as justification for persecuting minorities.

“Probably.”