by 
It has emerged that a total bastard has organised a meeting which you will be compelled to attend later today, despite it being Friday afternoon before a bank holiday weekend.
The meeting is set to last an extraordinary two and a half hours and will begin at three o’clock this afternoon, meaning that the start of your bank holiday weekend drinking will be delayed by at least half an hour.
The meeting request was accompanied a thirty-page pdf document for attendees to ‘familiarise themselves with’, and rumours persist that the complete bastard has prepared a 200-slide PowerPoint.
With over twenty different people on the attendee list for the meeting, it had initially been thought that there was scope for forming a tight squad of operatives to ambush the little bastard on his way back from lunch and threaten to tell the department manager about his stash of porn on the P: drive unless he cancels the meeting.
However, that option was eliminated when it became apparent that the creepy bastard had actually gone for lunch with the department manager so he could laugh at their jokes.
There is no hope left, and you will have to attend the meeting.
It is thought that, unless there are some impressive biscuits in the room, you will have no option but to hand in your notice with immediate effect.
