Ministers have launched a furious attack on the BBC after the first episode of their new prestige nature documentary Wild Isles showed no support for their new asylum bill.
“Disgusting, frankly. It was just a load of woke nonsense about puffins and no mention at all how awful immigrants are,” said Tory party deputy chairman Lee Anderson.
“I knew I was in for another lecture from the liberal elite when it didn’t open with a rousing chorus of God Save the King and the words ‘England is the best country in the world and everyone else can piss off’ – something I’ve long campaigned for all BBC programmes to do.”
Mr Anderson found himself increasingly agitated as the programme went on that it was showing no support for the government’s new asylum bill.
“I don’t think that’s on, frankly. This is supposed to be the national broadcaster, and it was a major new TV programme, and yet there was nothing.
“If it were me, I’d have kept the bit with the dormouse, I’m sure everyone’s wives enjoyed that as much as mine did. So five minutes on the dormouse and then the rest of the programme would be given over to explaining why refugees fleeing persecution are actually a bunch of freeloading bastards who deserve nothing more than a punch in the balls.”
Other Tories agreed, with one stating he’d smashed up his television after the show finished and Dominic Raab being so affronted that he kicked an aide up the arse.
Director General Tim Davie was unable to comment on the criticism as he had Rishi Sunak’s boot in his mouth.