Homosexual calls for conversion therapy to ‘cure’ Christianity

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One of the country’s leading homosexuals has called for the use of the controversial conversion therapy to try and ‘cure’ Christianity.

“Christianity is a fundamental danger to the well-being of society,” said Simon Williams, a homosexual anti-religion campaigner.

“To have a group of people so obsessed with what other people do with their genitals is frankly, very very weird.

“Now, yes, I accept that their Bible actually has very little to say about sexual behaviour, but Christianity seems to have moved so far away from those teachings that its primary reason to exist now appears to be making people angry about what other people do with their genitals.

“Can you imagine bringing up children in that sort of environment? It simply can’t be healthy.”

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Mr Williams went on to describe the nature of the conversion therapy.

“Well, we start gently by just showing the Christian some videos of people happily chatting normally and not being angry in any way about the sex that other people are having.

“Then we say words like ‘homosexual,’ ‘oral,’ and ‘girl on girl costume-play,’ and the subject is taught ways not to spend the rest of the day unhealthily fixating on the topic.

“Finally, the subject goes out for a drink with a homosexual, and if they make it through the evening without once thinking about the homosexual engaging in acts with another homosexual, then they’re cured.

“We have a very high success rate, because no one is born Christian.”

Although the majority of the population is sceptical about the morality of so-called conversion therapy, if it’ll stop Christians endlessly banging on about homosexuals, people seem perfectly happy for it to be used.