The World Economic Forum has begun in Davos, Switzerland, with delegates unanimously passing an early resolution confirming that all you people are all f**king peasants and if you go anywhere near them, they’ll set the dogs on you.
The World Economic Forum is a collection of business leaders and other bastards who gather together in the Swiss resort of Davos once a year to congratulate each other on how fabulously wealthy they are.
This year, the key theme of the conference is being better than everyone else, and the resolution was the culmination of a full day of seminars and lectures about how ghastly you people are.
“It’s been a tremendously edifying experience,” said Lord Simon Williams, CEO of Arctic Drilling Corporation, owner of Wiltshire and total bastard.
“We had a fascinating lecture from Mark Carney on why ordinary people are awful, an interview with Mark Zuckerberg about his ongoing contempt for his own customers, and a workshop on how to cope with the crushing realisation that you are everything that is wrong with the world.
“Now, in accordance with our new resolution, clear off you f**king peasant or I’ll set the dogs on you.”
It is expected that, following this new resolution, the members of the World Economic Forum will spend the next year treating you all like the f**king peasants you are.
Just like the previous year and, most likely, the following year.