“I had way more” – Donald Trump mocks feeble number of classified documents at Biden address

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Former president and leading satsuma impersonator Donald Trump has mocked his successor Joe Biden for the paltry number of classified documents stashed in the garage of his Delaware home.

“Well, that’s not very much is it?” Said Mr Trump on hearing that a small box of classified documents had been found in President Biden’s garage.

“Just a carton? A single box? What a loser. I had roomfuls, I had so many classified documents. So many. The most. I was building a new wing at my place just so I could store all my classified documents.

“Joe’s only got a box. Now, I don’t know, maybe that means he isn’t as important a president as I am? I don’t know. A lot people are saying that though. You know, if you’re a really important President then you’re going to have a lot of those classified documents at your home aren’t you? I had so many more classified documents than sleepy Joe. 

“I guess he might be trying to show people that he’s as important me by keeping these classified documents where he lives, but I think he’d need to have a lot more. A lot. He’d need so many more classified documents before people think he’s as important a president as I am.”

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When asked to comment about the classified documents, President Biden answered “What? You need to speak up? No, I don’t know nothing about no hassle-fried occupants, now you leave me be, it’s time for my programme.”