FIFA President defends Qatar World Cup in tracksuit stuffed with cash

author avatar by 7 days ago

FIFA President Gianni Infantino has defended the decision to hold the World Cup in Qatar while wearing what appeared to be a tracksuit stuffed full of cash.

Infantino said it was ‘hypocrisy’ to criticise the Qatari regime, in between bouts of coughing up hundred dollar bills like a furball.

Infantino spoke for nearly an hour and made a passionate defence of Qatar and the tournament while viewers were endlessly distracted by the rustling noise made by the wads of cash being repeatedly stuffed inside his tracksuit.

Every time he said something nice about the Qatari regime, another stack of hundred-dollar bills would appear on the desk in front of him.

Football fan Simon Williams told us, “It was strange, I’m used to football press conferences being about tactics, and players, or injuries and score forecasts, so it was unusual to watch one which was nothing more than the desperate defence of a backward country that by luck of geography has lots of money.

“At one point, Infantino told everyone this would be the best World Cup ever, and an Arab man walked onto the stage and stuffed a handful of dollars into his trousers. You don’t expect to see that sort of thing this side of the rope outside Spearmint Rhinos.

“Either way, I’m sure his decision to suddenly praise the regime that has made his organisation extremely wealthy while criticising western countries just a day after he was re-elected as FIFA president is a complete coincidence.

“I’m sure he’d have been perfectly happy calling western countries hypocrites if he still needed their votes.”

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