Slow clap for Liz Truss this Thursday at 8pm

author avatar by 1 year ago

The nation will be showing its encouragement for Liz Truss’ swift resignation this Thursday evening.

After a series of terrible decisions, followed by embarrassing U-turns, Mrs Truss is considered Prime Minister in name only, and “toast” as far as everyone else is concerned.

“So we’re going to do a slow clap, just to encourage her out the door,” confirmed Governor of the Bank of England, Andrew Bailey.

“I’m going to put on a proper sarcastic facial expression as well. The kind I usually reserve when talking to the mother-in-law.

“It’s important that Liz Truss knows that is absolutely, categorically, not a show of support for her premiership, but for her signature at the bottom of a letter that says “I’m sorry, goodbye” in several different ways.”

Citizen, Hayley Rice, said, “It will be nice to see all of our neighbours again, and to all come together in our support for Liz Truss’ resignation.

“We went back to ignoring each other after that whole clap-for-nurses thing. I wonder if Mr Stevens is still alive?”