After telling the nation through the medium or tortuous analogy that the key to prosperity is to ‘grow a bigger pie’, Liz truss has been filmed planting a small pie in her garden safe in the knowledge that under her guidance it will grow into a bigger one.
As Tory sycophants lined up to tell the prime minister how committed they are to pie-growing, Truss was quick to capitalise with a photo opportunity in her own garden.
She told reporters, “If there is one thing pies are well known for, when you manage them correctly, it is growing into bigger pies. They all do it. I once had a single mince pie that became a family steak and Kidney by mid-January, because I made the conditions optimal for pie-growing.
“This government is committed to growing pies, and I am committed to growing this small Balti pie I picked up in Birmingham into something a bit more palatable, like a Chicken and Leek, or maybe something with potatoes in it.
“Either way it will be bigger, because that’s what we do now. We grow pies.”