Queue for handing letters to 1922 committee “up to 12 hours long”

author avatar by 2 months ago

The queue to hand in letters of no confidence in Liz Truss has gotten absolutely enormous, according to reports this afternoon.

Typically, letters are handed in by members of the governing party, and no such queue is ever required. However, recent events have led to several thousand members of the public joining in on the fun.

“I’m a milkman,” confirmed milkman, Simon Williams, “Yes, we still exist.

“I heard about this 1922 thingy back in the halcyon days of the Boris Johnson government, a mere five weeks ago. I never thought I’d think about it again, but now here I am, queueing up with other British patriots, clutching our notes, many of which simply say ‘get out’ on them.

“It really does make one proud to be British.”

Conservative MP, Hayley Rice, said ,”I knew I should have put a tent outside the 1922 office.

“Now I’m going to wait for five hours while this rag-tag mob of teachers, dinner ladies and nurses hand in bits of paper more than likely smeared in their own faeces.

“Don’t they realise I’m an MP and I should be handing in my bit of paper smeared in my own faeces FIRST?!

“Oh look, there go Phil and Holly sprinting past the line to hand their letters in. Colour me shocked.”

A local police officer commented, “We advise all members of the public to anticipate waiting times of around 12 hours. Please plan ahead by bringing bring folding chairs, food, hot drinks, and your burning hatred for the latest government.”

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