Actually, King Charles should definitely attend COP 27, decides Liz Truss

author avatar by 2 years ago

The Prime Minister has changed her mind. Again.

Yesterday, Liz Truss was advising the King that he should stay away from the COP 27 climate change conference which takes place next month in Egypt. 

So naturally, this morning she’s decided that he definitely has to go.

“Given the King’s passion for environmental issues, including how we can combat climate change, I think it would be really important for him to be there,” said the PM, trying on a mummy costume and doing an Egyptian dance in front of a mirror.

“I did originally say that it would be better for Charles to stay out of any politically charged discussions, but that was yesterday. And a lot can happen in one day, because that’s like – how many hours, Kwasi? Exactly, yes, forty-five hours.”

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This change of heart is just the latest in a series of Truss u-turns. But why does she change her mind so often?

Scientist Simon Williams explained.

“The human body replaces cells on a regular basis,” he said. “For example, on average, skin cells are replaced every 20 days while brain cells can last 30 to 50 years.

“Truss is obviously a physiological anomaly in that her brain cells appear to die off and get replaced on an almost daily basis. This means that she constantly has a new, infantile brain.

“It naturally follows that each of these underdeveloped brains will produce different thoughts entirely different to the previous day’s.”

Asked to comment on the theory, the Prime Minister said, “I don’t know anything about neuroscience but I do think that we should abolish the 45p rate of tax for the highest earners.”

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