The queue to file past a box containing the remains of a sweet little old lady has now reached such a length that even The Proclaimers are reluctant to join it.
Experts place conservative estimates of the current length of the queue to be well over a thousand miles, possibly approaching two thousand, which is more than enough to put even the most determined musical walkers off.
Speaking to reporters, Charlie or Craig Reid declared, “Our reputation for walking miles and miles for a cause is the stuff of legend, sure.
“But I’m afraid that when we’ve made such a trek, whether it’s five hundred miles or five hundred more, there needs to be something truly worthwhile at the end of it.
“From the sounds of it there’s not even a bar there to quench our thirst – that’s something they may need to reconsider when Charles pops his clogs in a few years’ time.”
Queue organiser Simon Williams responded, “It’s a fair point, yes – the queue has got a bit out of hand now.
“Perhaps it would have been quicker to pop the coffin on a trolley and just whizz it past the queue instead?”