Now it’s too cold, says Britain petulantly

author avatar by 2 years ago

It’s too cold now and we wish it could be nice and warm like it was before, Britain has announced this evening.

After weeks of staggering round panting desperately before falling over like a stray dog in Cairo, British people have decided this wet weather is rubbish and it was much better when the sun was out.

“Its summer, it’s supposed to be warm,” said massive hypocrite Simon Williams, who three days ago was collapsed in a moist puddle of his own creation in a room with all the curtains closed.

“Why can’t we have rain in spring or autumn and a bit of sunshine whilst we’ve got the long evenings to enjoy?” he added without mentioning he didn’t leave the house for an entire week without bitching earlier this month.

“Ill never get a tan at this rate,” he said, glossing over that he went to the cinema on Sunday afternoon because it has air conditioning.

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In response to the complaints, the Met Office has announced they’re going to sack it off and go to the pub as you lot are never happy.

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