Amnesty International condemns Ukraine for spoiling Russian beach holidays

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In a strongly-worded statement, Amnesty International has condemned the Ukrainian army for a series of strikes which may have spoiled an afternoon at the beach for many Russians.

Steadfastly upholding the right of anyone to have a lovely, relaxing day untroubled by that war they started, Amnesty called upon Ukraine to show restraint over where they fire their missiles and suggest they restrict attacks to those military targets that are out if sight of popular tourist destinations.

Immediate reports suggest that one tourist dropped an ice-cream in shock at the succession of exploding Russian warplanes – which Amnesty described as an unconscionable loss and an unforgivable attack on civilians.

Meanwhile, the rapidly-expanding fireballs from detonating munitions are understood to have ruined many happy photographs of family outings.

“We call on Ukraine to show restraint and to avoid spoiling anyone’s day,” said Amnesty spokesman Simonov Williamsovitch.

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“Whilst defending your country is all very well, everyone has a fundamental right to a nice break and a dip in the sea, and we call on Ukrainians everywhere to find ways to defend themselves against rolling airstrikes which don’t inconvenience anyone else.”