China behaving like a happy and confident nation who are absolutely the best choice for Taiwan

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China has responded to the Taiwanese visit of a B-list politician who even history books will have forgotten in five years with a cheerful and restrained confidence that everyone is impressed by.

Certain in the knowledge that reunification is absolutely the best choice for Taiwan, the Chinese Communist Party arranged an impressive firework display in the straights between the two nations and fired off volleys of peace and friendship missiles.

Many in the international community had regarded China as a deeply insecure nation with an inferiority complex, but the mature dignity the country has shown in the face of the visit has done much to confound that belief.

“It’s a hearts and mind campaign,” explained CCP Foreign Minister Sino Wirriams. “Like we ran in Hong Kong. The people there are absolutely happier these days.

“Or that’s what the ones who are left tell us, anyway.”

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The people of Taiwan have responded positively to the obvious displays of friendship from China.

“They seem like such calm, happy and reasonable people”, one told us.

“Nothing they have done has made me think when they say ‘hearts and minds’ they mean spreading mine and my family’s all over the street if I disagree, and I’m sure I won’t fight to the death to resist them if they invade like Ukraine did.”

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