Wednesday 3 August 2022

Rebekah Vardy claims she never sold stories to The Sun in exclusive story she sold to The Sun


Rebekah Vardy

Rebekah Vardy has decided that the best way to demonstrate that she is not the sort of person who would sell stories to The Sun is by selling her exclusive story to The Sun.

In a move that will be filed away under ‘entirely predictable behaviour’, Vardy signed an exclusive deal to tell The Sun everything about her claims in court that she doesn’t sell stories to The Sun.

Rational human being Simon Williams told us, “If this is the sort of evidence she relied on in court, then it is absolutely no surprise whatsoever that she got her arse handed to her by Colleen Rooney’s legal team.

“Though I suspect a team of pre-schoolers playing a ‘lawyering’ could have won that case against her given the way she’s leapt into the arms of The Sun the very moment its over.

“If I’d had my reputation ripped to shreds in public during the duration of the trial, and with an entire nation now confident I’m a liar, I think the last thing I’d do to try and redeem myself is the very thing I insisted I never do.

“This is a bit like voting to Tory to prove you don’t vote Tory.

“Still, this is The Sun we are talking about, so plenty of their readers will no doubt believe selling your story to The Sun is proof you aren’t the sort of person who sells stories to The Sun.”

Meanwhile, Leicester manager Brendan Rogers’ phone is currently ringing off the hook as Jamie Vardy’s agent insists his client really needs a pay rise and a nice new long-term contract.

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