Thursday 23 June 2022 by Neil Tollfree

Brexiters cheered as re-emergence of Polio takes Britain another step back to its glorious past


Nigel Farage happy with Polio return

Brexiters have hailed the re-emergence of Polio in the British population as another step on their road back to the past.

“Tremendous news,” exclaimed human ballbag Nigel Farage.

“Removing ourselves from the EU was just the first step. It’s important to maintain momentum and keep the country on track to regress to the past.

“I think that everyone remembers Britain was a far stronger, more resilient country when we had Polio to toughen us up and not have to reliant on these namby-pamby foreign so-called vaccines to weaken our British mettle.

“Having Polio back in the population will make us stronger again.”

Mr Farage is hoping that more retreats to the pass will follow.

“Oh, I’m sure that Brexit and polio are just the beginning, soon enough we’ll have bosses being able to feel up secretaries without fear of persecution, only three TV channels all showing racist comedians, pipes, the BBC Light Programme, Page 3, shit hats, and making tits of ourselves in Egyptian wars.

“Soon enough we’ll all be living in a glorious past where everyone wears boring clothes, knows their place and where the highlight of the week is watching a paedophile on the television as you eat a Shippams meat paster sandwich.”

Mr Farage stopped short of calling for Smallpox to be brought back after Polio, but is understood to privately believe that it ‘would sort out those bloody wokes once and for all’.

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