Wednesday 1 June 2022 by Neil Tollfree

Man wakes up to find space behind TV turned into student flats


man shocked

A Chelmsford man was shocked to wake up and discover that the space behind his TV had been converted into student flats.

“Well, one night there was nothing there except for all the wires for the telly, and a dead spider that I couldn’t quite reach,” said Simon Williams, a father-of-two.

“Then I came down the next morning to find that there was a six-story block of student flats there. I don’t know how they manage to get them up so quickly.”

Mr Williams explained that he was doing his best to get along with the students, but there were tensions.

“I’m sure they’re nice kids but, well, take the other night, me and the wife were trying to watch Gogglebox and it was all fine until about halfway through when they started playing Dua Lipa at full volume. Now, I like Dua Lipa, but not while we’re trying to watch Gogglebox.

“Then they started having this big party that went on till god knows when. I mean, if we’re going to have student accommodation in the front room, the least they can do is show a bit of respect. That space behind the telly used to be a nice area.”

However, the students have defended themselves from the criticism.

“Well, look, we’ve got to live somewhere,” said student Eleanor Gay.

“Yes, we have the occasional party, of course we do, we’re young people. But it’s not excessive, and Mr Williams and his family are always welcome to come round behind the TV and enjoy themselves. We’ve always said that.

“And, actually, having that TV on constantly when you’re trying to study is really distracting. I was trying to focus on Romanian agricultural law last night, and all I could hear was the theme to Call the Midwife.”

The council have refused to do anything.

“We understand that there are some challenges, but, provided they’re nowhere near me, students bring a vibrancy to the community and offer a real boost to the local economy,” said councillor Reginald Binlid.

Sadly, it looks like things will go from bad to worse for the Williams family as new construction has started in the cupboard under their stairs and, although unconfirmed, it is rumoured that too is set to become student accommodation.

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